Oh Boy!

Just got back from New Year’s in Cabo San Lucas, where we had no newspapers or radio, and only Fox News on the TV. So it wasn’t until I checked my in-box this morning that I saw the wonderful news: apparently gay people can get married all over America, serve openly in the military and/or clergy, and adopt children and/or not see the ones they already have forcibly removed from their homes!

How else would The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation have the time to demand an apology from NBC for Gene Shalit’s bad review of “Brokeback Mountain?”

Here’s the story; try not to spill your coffee when you recoil in terror:

In the piece, Shalit refers to Jake Gyllenhaal's character, Jack, as a "sexual predator" who "tracks Ennis down and coaxes him into sporadic trysts." Shalit's bizarre characterization of Jack as a "predator" and Ennis (Heath Ledger) as a victim reflects a fundamental lack of understanding about the central relationship in the film and about gay relationships in general. It seems highly doubtful that Shalit would similarly claim that Titanic's Jack (Leonardo DiCaprio) was a "sexual predator" because he was pursuing a romantic relationship with Rose (Kate Winslet).

Hey, GLAAD, can I have my donation back, please? The homeless guy with the imaginary cell phone on my corner would use it more responsibly.

While I agree that Shalit’s take on the story is boneheaded and his choice of words indelicate, it’s a review of a movie. And it’s from Gene Shalit, who, in terms of cultural influence, ranks up there with Snap and Crackle, but just behind Pop. Don’t get me wrong- if Byron Allen doesn’t like the movie, we’re fucked; Gene (who, by the way, has also written a really lovely piece about his gay son on P-FLAG’s website) I think we can let slide.

As for the “Titanic” claim, apparently GLAAD has never been to an open-mic night. The “if you act like John Cusack characters in real life, you get a restraining order” bit is so played out, even Dane Cook won’t go near it.

But the worst part is that we’re getting attacked- for real and every single day- by segments of the population who are convinced that the things we’re fighting for- the ability to marry the person you love, the legal right to not lose your job or home because of your sexual orientation, to name a few- are special rights. Of course they’re not, but if Gene Shalit is ultimately pressured into apologizing for not getting “Brokeback Mountain,” I predict we’ll have a much tougher time getting that point across. The right to be shielded from negative interpretations of movies we like by pun-happy, Muppetesque morning-show personalities is so special, I hear the old CBS intro-bumper music just thinking about it.

We are on the slow, windy, one-way road to equality, and GLAAD has done some great, difficult work to make that happen. But as we draw closer to that destination, let's choose our battles. Ultimately, equality means hearing your fair share of opinions you don't agree with, even from your friends.

Comments

[Scott]

Though we're on the same page with all of your well stated thoughts here, it makes me smile that we both likened Mr. Shalit to a muppet on the internets today.

[Jen]

I just saw Brokeback Mountain tonight. It's as beautiful as it is heartbreaking. You should see it.

(Also Ang Lee is really good with shooting landscapes! Very pretty!!)

[Mark]

Wait til it comes out that Shalit was found in bed with Guy Smiley. They're made for each other.

[VP]

There are no corners, nor homeless, in Laurel Canyon. No, not even on the Studio City side.

But good points.